Friday, November 30, 2018

Naked Erection



A.k.a. constructing a shelf, while nude. I could have used the word "construction", but this is more fun, isn't it? After all, the shelf is designed to stand up straight and tall when it's finished. ;-) Although I'm probably just pissing everybody off - half the people will be mad that there isn't really an erection, and the other half will be annoyed by the "gratuitous" sexual innuendo. Feel free to add in your own references to "screwing" and "hammering", as well as being "nailed". (It's almost like our sexual slang was invented by carpenters!).




I must apologize for the colors. This room was doing something weird with the white balance. I think the blue light from the window was mixing with the yellow light from the fixture, producing a sickly green pallor against the walls, or something. And I can't for the life of me seem to fix it. Lesson learned the hard way.

Unboxing

I had to shoot this part separately because it works much better in a vertical orientation, while the rest seems perfectly suited to a horizontal orientation. There's nothing like getting down on your hands and knees on the floor!

Prep Work

As for the rest, this quickly became a fairly unwieldy project, so I split it up into bite-size chunks.

Construction

I hope that, altogether, it's not too much - I tried to cut it down to just the most visually interesting sections, while not leaving out any critical parts of the construction. Editing the hammer-and-nail section was the most annoying.

Nailing the Backboard

I probably should have shot this last part in a vertical orientation again. Oh well. I still think it looks good.

Placing the Shelves

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