Sunday, March 31, 2019

Two Kinds of Sex-Positivity

I've always had mixed feelings about sex-positivity as an institution, originating from the rather sex-critical perspective of feminism. Call it my bias, but sex-positive spaces seem so often to be littered with what I perceive as rather sex-negative messages - for example, /r/SexPositive contains in its own sidebar two links labeled "I'm A Sex-Negative Feminist" and "Why 'Sex-Positive' Feminism Is Sex-Negative For Me." (I agree with most of their listed ideals, although "the destruction of patriarchy" seems awkwardly shoed-in from the feminist theory, and I find it interesting that "radical consent" is defined elsewhere as "affirmative and enthusiastic" consent, rather than a radical view of who and in what circumstances somebody is capable of giving consent - rather than more liberal, it actually seems more constrictive of sexual behavior). I suppose I've just come at the position from a different angle. And if I had a different name, I'd call it that, but it really is all about having a positive attitude toward sex. If anything, the feminists should call themselves "sex-critical". But what bothers me about "establishment" sex-positivity is just that - the critical attitude.

I'm going to generalize here (fair warning), but it seems as though the establishment sex-positive position holds positive sexual experiences for all (to the degree that they want them) as the primary goal, with less negative sexual experiences as the necessary corollary. And the most obvious vector for this level of satisfaction is consent (although education is also of critical importance). But, seeing the myriad complications that arise in many people's sexual experiences, one is then compelled to view sex critically - especially alternative and fringe sexual passions. On the one hand, whatever desires one may have, as long as they can be fulfilled safely and sanely, involving only informed and consenting participants, positively impacting all those involved, then it's all gravy. But in a way, this can act as a straitjacket, restricting one's conception of what healthy sexuality may entail - like a far looser version of the Catholic church's emphasis on the missionary position. Certain sexualities outside of the normal may be considered problematic, and viewed heavily with suspicion, due to their latent potential to cause others (if not also oneself) distress of a sexual nature, which would serve to reduce the positive impact that sex ought to have on everyone's lives.

Consider, for example, someone who delights in getting a surreptitious peek up a stranger's skirt in public - an act that is currently heavily disparaged by the progressive camp. I've even encountered growing sentiment that the innocuous act of pleasuring oneself behind closed doors to images of individuals of unconfirmed origin shared on the internet ought to be considered non-kosher, on account of the fact that the individuals in question may not have "consented" to their images being used in this way. I consider this a casualty of valuing safety over liberty, raising the possibility for offense at something that mankind should take for granted (that a sexual organism will fantasize about what it sees, and may masturbate to such fantasies in private) over the freedom of individuals to exert agency over their own sexual thoughts. Your agency over your own body stops where my agency over my own mind begins.

Now, I will concede that picture trading is a grey area, because it can be an avenue for the violation of trust and privacy. And this is a case where ignorance (and not just directed malice) - a don't ask, don't tell policy, if you will - can contribute to the propagation of these transgressions. But, say what you will, I think anyone who shares a picture on the internet, or even allows an image of them to be created, should understand that the possibility exists that at some point, somebody may masturbate to it. But rather than frightening people away from taking and sharing images, I think this is a fact of life we should learn to take for granted, because I see no reason why it should be cause for any alarm. It's just part of existing in a society comprised of sexual organisms. And unlike harassment, which is antisocial at its core, this isn't a toxic behavior that needs to be eliminated.

So rather than being concerned with making sure all sex acts that occur are kosher, with no mind to those who may go frustrated and unfulfilled, I prefer to look at it from the perspective of working towards sexual satisfaction for all, regardless of the nature of one's desires, even if some of those desires are more challenging to fulfill ethically than others, and at the fundamental level, that as long as one knows how to behave oneself, one should not feel ashamed for the feelings one has that leads to sexual stimulation, no matter what anyone else who does not share them might think about those feelings.

Let me state clearly that my own brand of sex-positivity does not conflict with the ideology outlined above - it does not condone any kind of behaviors that victimize innocents and cause distress of a sexual nature to anyone (outside of mutually consensual BDSM-type arrangements). I merely approach it from a different perspective - not one that is overly critical, but rather one that is more forgiving, and willing to hand out the benefit of the doubt. The foundational principle of sex-positivity, in my mind, isn't necessarily the ideal that everyone should be having only positive sexual experiences (although that would be a good thing), but that the sexual energy that permeates our lives is viewed, not with suspicion, but as a positive thing. Even though it may sometimes be misdirected (often devoid of ill intention - a result of ignorance, and not maleficence - the solution then being education, and not public shaming, as mistakes ought to more readily be considered reparable setbacks than life-altering traumas). Obviously, when this energy is twisted to violent ends, this is a travesty. But alone, in and of itself, removed from context, the desire to seek sexual satisfaction, and the myriad ways the human organism pursues it, is a wondrous curiosity, and not a blade waiting to be sharpened. In a sense, it's coming at sex-positivity from a position of innocence rather than cynicism.

Certainly, it could be argued that innocence is synonymous with naivety (and I admit it is unusual for me to pass over the cynical stance), but I see more beauty in innocence, more pleasure, and my own personal experience of sexual desire reflects an innocent attitude - again, in the sense I've described before, not as a lack of experience, but an approach, an attitude that rejects the Pandora's box of evils that much of society associates with sex. It is a purer approach. Not reflective of virginity, but freedom from corruption. Not defining carnal knowledge as corruption - this is the sex-negative strategy. Sex-positivity is stating that one can have carnal knowledge and still be without sin. To refuse to associate such knowledge with pollution, either of the body or mind.

Saturday, March 30, 2019

Garage Back Door

It just so happens that there's a window right there outside this door, so every time I make a trip to the garage in my birthday suit, and the light is shining at the right angle, I can't help but catch a glimpse of my reflection; and as I've written in the past, for a self-portrait photographer (who can't watch myself from a third person perspective on a regular basis), reflections (though usually from mirrors) are a huge inspiration and catalyst for my work. For these shots, I wanted to try to capture just what I saw in that reflection.

Thursday, March 28, 2019

Stepping Out of the Wardrobe

A play on "coming out of the closet". Honestly, I'm not sure if this is a better representation of coming out as a crossdresser (since the closet is filled with women's clothes), or as a nudist (since I'm naked), but either way, I thought it was a neat idea (and one that I've toyed with before).

Wednesday, March 27, 2019

Human Anatomy

Human anatomy - so much controversy over such a simple thing. I try not to let myself be blinded by my own bias - as I've had the opportunity to become quite accustomed to the sight of naked bodies, and I recognize that not everyone has had this privilege. But, if you can believe it, there was a time when I was quite prudish about exposed skin - to an embarrassing extent. I consider it a firsthand lesson in how people can grow and change and evolve, and a reminder that not everyone who may be an enemy today will remain so indefinitely. But I know what it's like to be repressed. I wasn't born liberated - I had to make the journey.

Still, allowing for growth and variance, there is an element of hypocrisy that I cannot abide. Personality-wise, I can have a tendency to be picky and uptight. Rationally, I have come to the conclusion that freedom is an unassailable virtue. But emotionally, I desire to control every aspect of my environment. But you know, that has taught me a hard lesson - and it's an argument I've made before on the subject of trigger warnings. It's not possible to control every aspect of my environment. So I have had to learn, for better or worse, to live with things that annoy or offend or sometimes even traumatize me (when, as is sometimes the case in life, it is not possible to simply remove myself from the situation - although this is a strategy I wish more people would attempt to employ more frequently).

Not only have I been incapable of controlling the behaviors of other people, in order to produce a consistently pleasant environment around myself, it seems the accepted opinion that, even were it possible, to even do so would be unjust. Which is a conclusion that I agree with rationally, if only because the golden rule demands it, given that I wouldn't want others to control my behavior for their own personal reasons. (Communication and compromise, on the other hand, is healthy).

Aye, but here's the rub: they do so anyway, even as they tell me it's wrong. And the only reason they can get away with it is because their opinion on this issue (the issue of nudity) is the popular one, and I'm the one on the lunatic fringe. (And the social conditioning is so bad that even many of the people who should be on my side - other nudists - instead agree with our opposition, to avoid making waves). But like every issue of justice that was once unpopular and is now taken for granted (more or less) - be it women's suffrage, racial equality, or tolerance of certain sexual minorities (but not others) - I believe that just because it is now, baby, doesn't mean it should be. I just don't have a lot of patience waiting for society to catch up. Unfortunately, I don't have much of a choice, either.

Friday, March 22, 2019

Shame vs. Hormones

We are sexual organisms. Individuals will, of course, vary, but generally speaking, we are programmed to have lustful feelings towards the human body - and, depending on psychological conditioning, sometimes other things. That any social institution (be it religion or otherwise) should capitalize on making us feel ashamed of this fact is tragic, and I reject it.

It is not unreasonable for us to step back and consider the way we feel, and what these feelings compel us to do. Otherwise, the Hormone Monsters within us all would rage unchecked, and might tear civilization apart in a grandiose orgy. (Not that there's anything wrong with orgies, but without a measured conscience, there's no guarantee that consent will be respected).

But we mustn't let the Shame Wizard seep into our subconscious either, making us feel bad for the things that are supposed to make us feel good. As long as you are in control of yourself, and able to act rationally, there is no reason to feel bad for the thoughts you have that turn you on, and the fantasies you pursue towards sexual satisfaction.

Regarding the phenomenon of "post-orgasmal guilt", whether there is an element of psychochemistry involved (i.e., coming down off of a high), or the expression of a social need unfulfilled (i.e., the desire for intimacy in the absence of a partner), to whatever extent a sexually repressive culture exploits this weakness, I view succumbing to it as a character flaw.

In order to avoid sexual hypocrisy - which results in the abhorrent practice of indulging in sexual desires behind closed doors while condemning them openly in public - I've taken the advice of one of history's most notorious perverted sages (whatever his reputation may be, he was as much a philosopher as a scoundrel). The Marquis de Sade once wrote, "whether one is stiff, or whether one is not, one's philosophy, acting independently of the passions, should always remain the same."

In other words, do not allow yourself to be swayed by the heat of passion to engage in anything you'll have to apologize for later, and similarly, don't apologize for anything you permit yourself to do in the heat of passion - stand your ground. Only by doing this can you lead a fully authentic lifestyle, in and out of the metaphorical bedroom. This is how I've always approached being an internet model.

I was going to record a video of me masturbating, but I guess the thought of it got me too excited, and before I knew it I was past the point of no return! Ah well, it's not like you haven't seen it before. :-p

Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Looking Up, Looking Down

Not to be crude, but this is an angle you don't see often.

Friday, March 15, 2019


Actually, I suppose it's more like "out-n-in", but that doesn't roll off the tongue as easily as "in-n-out". (Not to be confused with the west coast burger joint).

It begs the question of why I would do a shoot that involves standing in an open doorway on a cold day in March when there's snow on the ground (and not wait for a nicer day later in the spring), but these things happen spontaneously sometimes, and you gotta go where your inspiration takes you.

Thursday, March 14, 2019


Further inspired by my experiments with "absolute bare minimum coverage", I wanted to see how minimally I could cover myself with a simple scarf.

Although it defeats the purpose of being covered, sometimes having just a little bit peeking out can drive you wild. It's not full exposure, but you're still definitely seeing something you're not supposed to be able to see.

The purple scarf worked perfectly for something I could wrap around my neck that would hang just long enough down the front of my body, but for wrapping around my torso, it was longer than it needed to be, so I got a shorter scarf.

I tied it off with a matching scarf to create a makeshift bikini brief. I've worn some pretty skimpy briefs, even ones that don't have adequate coverage, but this barely even counts as clothing!

Wednesday, March 13, 2019

Rainbow Swirl

On the flip side of the door frame. Experimenting once again with absolute bare minimum coverage. This time with a rather eye-catching rainbow swirl dish.

The stimulation of repeatedly tucking my genitalia behind this rather modestly sized covering (it would have been easier if I'd had no pubic hair to conceal) resulted in it growing harder and harder (-_^) to fit everything behind it. So I ditched the rainbow swirl for this last shot and decided to illustrate instead what I said once before about hiding your erection along the length of your forearm. This is what's hiding behind my arm in the last shot on that page:

Anything more than a handful is a bonus. ;-p

Tuesday, March 12, 2019

Door Frame

A few images I shot inspired by something I saw on the internet. These "on/off" comparison shots (dressed vs. naked) are fairly popular, and I can understand why. I find the comparison intriguing, and it fuels the imagination of anyone who's ever encountered an attractive stranger (or acquaintance) and fantasized about what they look like naked. Of course, where nudists are concerned, there is no imagination necessary. :-p

Thursday, March 7, 2019


a.k.a. Snow Shower

So, I broke down and went outside in the snow after all, but mainly because I thought of an idea for a video that I haven't done before. I saw all the snow built up on top of the tree branches - I love how it looks when the whole world is blanketed in snow - and I thought it would be fun to stand underneath them and knock some of the snow down on top of me.

Word of warning: For your own safety, as well as the health of the trees, I don't recommend hanging on the branches in this weather, as they may be brittle and prone to snapping off. (Don't ask me how I know this)...

Wednesday, March 6, 2019

In Like A Lion

Just when you thought spring was on the way, we get a heavy snowfall, followed by a week of freezing temperatures - meaning that the snow sticks around for a change, instead of melting off within 18 hours of falling. Lousy smarch weather, indeed.

I considered going out in the snow, but something kept me inside this time. Maybe it's because I just got over a really bad cold. Or maybe it's because it's March, and I wasn't really expecting to roll around in the snow again this season. Or maybe it's because I've already done the big snow shoot this year (I even got to finally build that snowman!), and I didn't want to repeat myself. Although this is a very similar theme to one I did several years ago, but this time I managed without having to combine multiple exposures.

Monday, March 4, 2019

Checking In

Check it out - I'm checking in for a nude check-up!

Seeing as I don't "visit" this blog as much as I did last year (which is to say, daily), I felt like dropping in, as if to say, I'm still out there, still living a nude life (as much as possible), and still occasionally taking pictures to share.

Last year's project involved a lot of work, and at times it was hard to keep up. But I tell you, if I go too long without taking a picture, I start to miss it. It's a lot of fun, expressing myself in this way - both being able to share my vision of a beautiful naked life, and using those opportunities to share some of my thoughts and opinions on related topics. I don't think I'm ever going to want to quit. It'd just be nice if someday I could find a muse to shoot in my place, when I get old and frail (it consistently surprises me what physical effort self-portrait photography is) and not so pretty anymore...