Thursday, October 13, 2016

The Best of Cocktoberfest

A few years ago, I got it in my head to celebrate "Cocktober" by taking a picture of my penis every day for a whole month. Why? Because I'm a twisted pervert, of course - and, I relish an artistic challenge. Informal, cell phone photography seemed a perfect fit for this project, so it basically turned out to be a month-long series of sexting pics. Now, lord knows men don't need any more incentive to take pictures of their dicks, but I thought that the pressure of taking a different picture every day (because nobody needs 30 copies of the same picture) would push me to be creative, and raise the bar for the "dick pic" standard. And that can only be a good thing, right? So let me now present to you the highlights of my Cocktoberfest celebration. And men, the next time you find yourself pointing a camera at your cock, think about how much more interesting that picture of your penis will be if you get a little creative with it. Remember, the goal is to make people smile and laugh, not cringe and scramble for the "block" button. -_^

Guitar Cock

Try posing your cock with various items of interest. Showcase your hobbies. Personalize your penis pictures.

Country Cock

Outdoors and exhibitionism-style pics are always exciting! But be aware of your surroundings - you don't want to get into trouble.

Porno Cock

Don't be afraid to use this as an opportunity to express your sexuality. Penises are for pleasure - so what gets you turned on?

Cupcake Cock

Sex and food go hand in hand, so serve up that gluttony with a heaping spoonful of lust!

Shower Cock

Soft, hard, or somewhere in between, penises are fascinating organs. See how much different you can get it to look from one day to the next.

Splatter Cock

Hey, this is October! Don't be afraid to get dirty. This is me having fun in the shower with some red face paint.

Hot Dog Cock

Fancy a footlong? We've got bun length wieners! (Don't tell me you've never wanted to try this :-p).

Crystal Cock

Put your cock to work. This one is purely ornamental. >.<

Hentai Cock

A demonstration of how Japan does censorship. (Weird, I know).

Rainbow Cock

Show your support for tolerance & diversity! Try shining some sunlight on a flipped-over CD for brilliant colors!

Glasses Cock

A perennial classic. Penises make great funny noses. Also popular are elephants' trunks.

Monster Cock

Forget Ken, let's see how you handle a real man, Barbie. Do you think you can take it all?

Trouser Cock

A.k.a. the ol' Jim Morrison. Just hangin' out. :-D

Hand Cock

Make sure you give that cock a nice, firm grip.

Squished Cock

Try to find new and original angles from which to photograph your penis. Some of them will naturally be more flattering than others. This is your chance to experiment!

Torpedo Cock

It's fun to play with the viewer's perspective. And if it makes you look even bigger, I guess that's an added bonus!

Long Hair Cock

Use your natural qualities to complement your anatomy. Whether it's your legs, hair, chest, or even your face, include it in that picture of your penis.

Cauldron Cock

Double, double, toil and trouble; fire burn, and cauldron bubble. Halloween must be fast approaching! (Always remember - safety first. You don't want to injure your precious organ).

Costumed Cock

My penis dressed up as a fairy princess for Halloween. What about yours? A pirate? A zombie? An astronaut ("to boldly go...")? Show us!

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