Friday, July 22, 2016

A Light Caress

I awoke to the feeling of the morning sun caressing me with its fingers. My skin tingled, and without opening my eyes, I spread my legs wide to let the warmth flow into me.


  1. Very cool effect. Clearly your skills are amassing not just as an artist but as a technical photographer as well. Have looked into any pro photographer gigs lately? Sure, everyone thinks they're a photographer these days but at least you've been putting in concrete work.

  2. There's little money in photography. And what money there is, although technical proficiency is a valuable skill, is mostly a reward for entrepreneurship. Not being an artist, or even a craftsman, but a businessman. And a self-promoter. And those are two skills I distinctly lack. Content providers are the work horses of the economic world. There would be no market without us, and yet, we're practically paid slave wages. Except, "photographer" isn't as reliable a position as, say, dish washer, where everyday you know there's going to be work, and you can just walk in and get paid for it (provided you work there and all).

    The other thing with professional photography is that you're being hired to take pictures of what somebody else wants you to take pictures of, so there's a lot more constriction in terms of the creative process. Do you know what the most lucrative subset of professional photography is? Wedding photography. I can't think of anything I'd have less enthusiasm shooting than a bunch of people at a wedding. Except the newborns and toddlers that people bring in to the mall to have "professionally" photographed, which is the next most lucrative subset of the industry. And god forbid anybody would hire a "pornographer" like me to shoot their teenage daughter's senior portrait (something I might actually have some interest in). -.-

    Even if I remained a portrait photographer, you still have to construct a social network, build up contacts, let people know you exist, and that you have these skills for hire. Which are, again, skills I don't have. I've been building up my "brand" over the years, on my own terms (which is the way I like it), in the hopes that maybe someday somebody with some clout will notice me and like the kind of work I do (and the longer it takes, the better that work will get, as I continue to gain experience). But that's a long shot, and even if it happens, it doesn't mean I'll ever be able to make a living off of my photography.

    As with any creative industry - music, for example - you get these high profile cases (e.g., The Rolling Stones, or in the case of photography, I don't know, Annie Leibovitz), but these people are literally the cream of the crop. (Which doesn't necessarily mean they're the absolute best, but they have that killer combination of talent and popularity, and a good dose of being in the right place at the right time). Point being, very few artists reach that level, and while talent is (generally) a necessary condition, it is not sufficient to grant you those rewards. Case in point, you have incredible guitarists like Roy Buchanan going relatively unknown and turning up strangled to death in a jail cell before their time.

    Anyway, for many years I've considered building up a network with models to work with, because I'd really like to work with other subjects (although the reality of working with other people might be a challenge for me) - but perhaps it's a moot point, because I tried joining the online monopoly on model/photographer networking (that is, once, and they flat out rejected me. So, there's that.

    Which is more than just incidental, because the stigma surrounding the kind of photography I do has a very real chilling effect on the work that's hypothetically available to me. But I'd rather do what I like and watch the doors swing shut than allow somebody else's determination of what's "appropriate" to restrict the way I express myself. And it's sad, but the "adult industry" has very little concern whatsoever with artistic talent, both on the producer and consumer side. I'd be just as miserable shooting a "scene" where the only thing that matters is the end user's (very specific, and narrow) reaction, and not the visual crystallization of erotic beauty, which is the driving principle behind my inspiration to pick up a camera. I'm just too much of an idealist.